High amounts of drug residue constantly found in country's beef supply

Meat eaters beware — 56 farms in 19 states have produced beef over the last year that tested for high levels of drugs — mostly antibiotics but also some anti-inflammatories — on more than one occasion, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA)(pdf).

The veal industry appears to have the worst record of compliance. Over the past year, there have been 86 instances where “bob veal” calves tested above the acceptable limits for antibiotic residue, according to the USDA. Bob veal are calves that are younger than three weeks and weight up to 150 pounds (regular veal weighs up to 450 pounds, and can be up to 18 weeks old, the USDA says).

The amounts are frightening — in some cases, up to 17 times the acceptable concentrations were found in veal. Golden Jay Dairy of Tulare, Calif., grew veal for Cutting Edge Meat of Newman, Calif., that had 17 times the acceptable concentration of Neomycin in the animal’s kidney as allowed per USDA regulations.

Johann Dairy Farm in Fresno, Calif., grew veal for Los Banos Abattoir in Los Banos, Calif., that has eight times the amount of Neomycin allowed.

Ken Naples of Canandaigua, NY grew bob veal for Ohio Farms Packing of Creston, Ohio, that had 12 times the allowable antibiotic.

The list goes on. What’s particularly unsettling is that brand names such as “California All Natural” were producing products that have excessive antibiotic residue. In some cases, the USDA limit is zero, and yet these companies are still producing meat, especially veal, that has too much drug residue.

The USDA compiles a list of repeat offenders (pdf) — farms and meat distributors that have failed drug residue tests more than once over the past year. The following states were home to farms that are repeat offenders, according to the USDA: Arizona, California, Georgia, Iowa, Illinois, Indiana, Kentucky, Maine, Michigan, Minnesota, New Mexico, New York, Ohio, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Puerto Rico, Utah, Vermont and Wisconsin.

California, by a long shot, had the most offenses — 24 farms in the Sunshine State failed to comply with residue limits.

Farms that had the most violations, according to the USDA, are VS Ranch (four in one month); Rancho Teresita (four over five months); R & D Ranch (five in one month, then another one six months later); Oakdale Calf Ranch (five in two months); Johann Dairy Farm (seven in three months); and Cunha Calf Ranch (seven in two months).

Muscle and kidney tissues from farms in the above  19 states contained either one or more of the following drugs: Penicillin*, flunixin*, Neomycin, Dihydrostreptomycin*, Sulfamethoxazole*, Desfuroylceftiofur, Tetracycline, Gamithromycin*, Gentamicin*, Ciprofloxacin*, Enrofloxacin*, Tylosin, Oxytetracycline, Sulfadiazine*, Florfenicol and Sulfadimethoxine.

Neomycin was the drug found most often in animals, according to the USDA. Flunixin is an anti-inflammatory drug, used mostly to treat muscle and joint pain and prevent sepsis (blood poisoning). Florfenicol is a synthetic antibiotic used to treat Bovine Respiratory Disease and foot rot. The remaining drugs are all antibiotics.

Maybe we should start buying organic meat, or stop eating meat all together, or call these farms and demand they stop using drugs on these animals. 

*These drugs have a zero residue limit in most applications.

The rise of atheism and the fall of God reflects the deepening chasm that prevents humanity from being human

In the beginning, something created what we call the universe and life. Theistic religions call that something “God” while atheists call it “something.” If atheists think or believe that science will someday reveal the genesis of life and the physical world, then atheists have faith that science will eventually deliver the answer. They have faith in science. If an atheist believes that we will never know, the atheist is also engaging in an act of faith — faith that mankind cannot ever discover the answer.

Faith is not an act that requires belief without evidence. It is merely a belief rooted in evidence of one’s own interpretation of what constitutes evidence. The moral battle between atheism, agnosticism and religion requires faith on all sides.

U.S. immigration reform: Let the American Indians decide

A woman in her mid 60s told me recently how illegal immigrants are destroying the economy because they’re taking jobs from Americans, not paying taxes and not contributing to the local economy because they send all their earnings back to their home country. Of course this is true to some extent, but I can’t help but think that this opinion is one of the most asinine and selfish perspectives on a reality that harkens to the founding of this country.

America, the north and south parts, was “founded” by illegal immigrants. Europeans came here, uninvited, stripped the land of resources and its people of dignity, placed a flag in the ground, drew some lines on a map, wrote some ideas down on paper and voila! A nation of savage tribes became instantly assimilated into the grand idea of a civilized country.

Now, my woman friend, let’s call her Agnes, tells me that this point is irrelevant, because “two wrongs don’t make a right.” Just because we did it to the Indians, doesn’t mean the Mexicans should do it to us, she said. By Mexicans, she means Latinos, basically.

“How do we fix the problem now?” Agnes asks.

True immigration reform requires a thorough examination of how American history, culture, business, politics and public policy have created a perfect storm for illegal immigration and undocumented employment.

Tightening our belts through increased security measures, stricter punishments to offenders and convoluting the legal immigration process will only lead to more problems. As the entrance barriers placed by the United States intensify, more and more people will be forced to enter this country illegally because the current system is already the strictest it’s ever been, especially since Sept. 11, 2001. Dirt poor immigrants face thousands of dollars in government and legal fees to obtain a green card today, and they would be even less equipped to engage in the legal process should it become more complicated and costly.

Why the Occupy Wall Street and Tea Party movements will not win

Occupy Wall Street, Tea Party, Ayn Rand, Barack Obama --

The long overdue conversation about the iniquitous inequity within capitalism’s illusory meritocratic class structure finally exploded into the global discourse with the Occupy Wall Street movement. Conversely, the embedded impotence and wastefulness of an enabling and codependent national government thrust into the spotlight with the Tea Party campaign. Neither of these will have any lasting effect, and here’s why.

The System
What is The System? The System is the Internet in real life — the world wide web personified. It is the interconnectedness of institutions, infrastructure, corporations, nonprofit organizations, utilities, governments, foundations, universities and, most importantly, mainstream media.

The System can not, in any real and permanent way, be challenged. Too many people benefit from its current structure and genuine change threatens the status quo. People in positions of power would never give up their seat at the head to allow honest reform. What’s in it for them? Herein lies the double-edged sword of capitalism. It motivates people to be successful, creates jobs and generates wealth, while simultaneously establishing a culture that nurtures questionable practices and exacerbates the class divide.

There’s nothing I’d like more than to systematically dismantle 80% of global corporations in the fields of banking, insurance, finance and investments, health care and hospitals, communications, industrial farming, pharmaceuticals, oil and gas and coal, garbage disposal, wastewater treatment, genetic seed-making, food and drink manufacturing, retail behemoths, entertainment and mass media (did I miss any?). Many of these system-elements began under an idealized vision to create a better society, but human greed created an atmosphere where profits superceded service. This mentality invades all aspects of society, from the small businessperson to the federal government.

Ayn Rand argued that a society which nurtures a human being’s latent selfishness is a society that prospers. Unfortunately for humanity, this is true, but only if we define “prosper” as it relates to material wealth. There certainly are other faces of prosperity — spiritual, mental, physical, social, historical, natural. A country with little material wealth, such as Ethiopia or Bolivia, has more historical and natural wealth than most developed countries combined. And yet, we, as the West, see them as “poor” or “impoverished” or “Third World” or “developing” (as if a country has to be developing to be considered a country. What if a country wants to stay the same as it has for thousands of years?).

I would argue that we are the poor ones — reliant on a system that nurtures selfishness instead of one that creates community.

If the entire system collapsed, everything we rely on would be destroyed. Our toilets wouldn’t flush, our refrigerators wouldn’t get cold. There would be no fuel for our cars or generator. Food would cease to be produced. Chaos would permeate everything we touch. Who would survive this fiasco? People with genuine life skills — farmers, hunters, builders, maybe doctors.

Specifically, indigenous people who have lived the same way for millennia would become rulers of the world. Not that it’s a title they seek, nor would they even know they held that position. They wouldn’t even realize what has taken place on a global scale until Westerners came to them trying to steal their land and livestock in a furious illustration of the classic “I want what you have only because you have it and I don’t” syndrome, the infamous Western plague on the world.

This is why Barack Obama, a president whom I felt would usher in genuine change, failed. I fell victim to rhetoric, as do many of us when it comes to taking politicians at their word — a seriously unfortunate mistake that should not be a mistake at all. Obama tried to pander to all sides because mainstream media told him he had to, that he couldn’t go in there with an iron fist and demand change as he would be seen as an ideologue, and would quickly become a pariah.

So he pandered and stumbled. The wars escalated. Banks got bailed out. Health care is now a crises rather than a concern. Israel still dominates Palestine. The list goes on. That’s not to say he hasn’t done anything good, but his mistakes outshine his accomplishments. Why? Because anyone who truly challenges the system will be taken out of the system, in one way or another. Obama’s fear, if not his ego, kept him from pursuing what’s right, so he fell for what’s expected.

For me, Occupy Wall Street was a breath of fresh air, even if half the people talk as if they’ve never read a book and were only there for the cheap weed and drum circles. I don’t resonate as much with the Tea Party, but I do agree that our federal and state governments need to be smaller, more efficient and accountable.

The problems in government reflect the problems in socialism, and the problems in the private sector reflect the problems in capitalism. A perfect society is an illusion because, as Ayn Rand said, people are innately selfish.

We can learn to love and be genuinely selfless, and there are plenty of good people in the world, even in the United States. It is quite possible that a genuinely good American can compete with the most altruistic people in the world, if only because to be good in America is akin to being a thriving lamb among lions. However, as the saying goes, one bad CEO spoils the pool of good CEOs. And there are plenty of bad executives to solidify that sentiment.

Like people, not all companies are bad. Some treat their employees like family and are an example for the rest of us. But this is an expensive proposition, and the temptation to fill our pockets to secure the future of our immediate blood relatives can be too strong to ignore.

If we are a single human family, we certainly don’t act like one. It amazes me that health care is not a basic human right, and that there are people in the United States who would rather see someone die because they didn't have insurance than actually help that person with their medical expenses. It amazes me that we still kill each other over ideas and land, that we act as if one culture has rights that another doesn’t. Why we force countries into debt under the guise of development while enslaving them to corporate interests.

How can we look at our neighbor in need and offer conditional help? It’s as if a person were drowning and our proposition was to them: We will save you, if only you work for me, buy your bread from me, live in my house and pay me rent with the salary I pay you.

How can we all not be ashamed of ourselves? It’s mind-boggling. How can we all sleep at night, knowing that the entire Iraq and Afghanistan war budgets would be enough to practically feed the entire world’s starving population for a lifetime? How can we stand by and watch pharmaceutical companies invade indigenous nations and enslave the populace to their venom while raping the local land of its resources to produce the venom?

Why do we allow companies such as Monsanto to own life, to patent creation, to give them the powers of a god, and then allow these companies to go into indigenous nations under the guise of establishing food security when in reality it enslaves the people to its profit structures? Why do we let for-profit companies own water rights?

Why do we allow governments to be corrupt to the hilt, to get away literally with murder? How is it possible that our military still uses mercenaries? Why do we allow hospitals to charge us ridiculous fees and let insurance companies rape us of our dignity?

The questions are never ending, and the answers don’t even matter. What we need is renewal by cleansing our minds. Our perceptions need a complete overhaul, that’s what matters. The lenses through which we view the world need to be changed. We should no longer see our neighbors or foreign cultures and people as “others” but as true brothers and sisters, in the most natural definition of the term.

If you are Christian, for the love of Christ, act like one. Be one. Ninety-five percent or more of people who call themselves Christian are merely going through embedded motions. Love your enemy as yourself, remember that one?

If you are a Muslim, for the love of Allah, act like one. Be one. Submit yourself to the will of Allah, knowing that Allah is a loving God. God does not need you for his wrath, for he has plenty of methods to express his anger (and plenty of reason to also) that don’t require human violence. If you want to kill infidels, kill first your perception of an infidel, and kill your illusions of the infidel, not the physical body of the infidel.

If you are a Buddhist, be one. Just be. If you are Taoist, be one. Let the river take you where it may. If you are Hindu, let Shiva destroy your material being so that you may be reborn as a spiritual soul.

If you are an agnostic, pursue truth and meaning and never let fear or ego prevent you from seeking understanding. If you are an Atheist, wallow in the joy of the pursuit of knowledge, and seek your own unity with your brothers and sisters. We are all dust, a flash in the pan, a brief sprout of grass on the infinite prairie of time.

If you are an Occupy Wall Street person or a Tea Party participant, let go of your anger and frustration and realize that true change begins internally, with a revolution of the mind. The easiest change starts with physical change, by living differently. The system will change if there is nobody to support it.

Don’t pay your taxes and don’t vote. Establish alternative currencies. Grow your own food. Make your own business. Embrace entrepreneurship. Create your own language. Unplug completely. Use the tools that are available without becoming a slave to these tools. Establish your own sovereign nation by seceding from your country. Avoid hypocrisy at all cost.

Maintain integrity, but keep your ego in check. Your decision benefits you, but you are merely a vessel on the greater vein of a greater organism called social change. We cannot fall victim to the endemic hubris that defines every major society throughout human history. We are all important individuals, but we are even more important as humanity. After thousands of years of completely fucking up our role as stewards of the Earth, it’s time we realized our purpose and lived it.

The Occupy and Tea Party movements will not win, but they also will not lose. The polarization of American politics threatens the status quo, but it also threatens real change. The world is not black and white, and until we can see colors, we will always remain stuck in the illusion of the “other.”

Let’s see the colors for their beauty, not judge them for their differences. We don’t have to radically remove ourselves from society as I suggested, but that is a physical way to ignite change within ourselves. We can all revolutionize our minds, but it is no simple task. It takes courage, strength, and fearless determination. It takes acceptance of humility, and active interpersonal and extra-social engagement.

Until we can all look into the eyes of a wheelchair-bound person and not feel pity but instead feel strength, or until we can watch a murderer and not feel revenge but instead feel forgiveness, or until we never again walk past a helpless person and ignore their cries for help, we will always fail as human beings.

Let’s be human, for once in our lives, and freaking love each other.

Temporary hiatus on this blog

The editors of The Clairvoyant Times have temporarily suspended this blog to direct you to its website.

The hu(new)man way will be back in working order someday before the author ceases to live. Thank you for your support.

Man with 79 IQ wins governor seat in Arizona

FROM THE FUTURE: Phoenix, Ariz. Nov. 3, 2010. Madness swept the country on the evening of Nov. 2, as voters turned out in record numbers to cast their ballots in what has become the most derisive election year in recent history.

But not a single pundit predicted the unprecedented victory of Paris Hilton’s fingernail cleaner, Rufus Berkowitz. “The Berk,” as he calls himself, received 79 percent of the vote in his home state of Arizona, and became the first man with an IQ under 80 to be elected to public office in the United States.

“Arizona is [a] good state,” The Berk said in his victory speech at the Hooters near Metroman Mall in Phoenix. “Is really, really, really good that those dumb [expletive] ain’t gonna run the show.”

Arizona voters seemed thrilled to have The Berk as their next governor.

When Javier Perez heard the news he took off running like a madman, belting Spanish phrases of jubilation as police officers chased him around the block screaming for his identification. After a thorough background check, DNA analysis and full-cavity body search, the authorities released the 31-year-old painter from Mesa. But Perez would net let the police ruin this special day.

“This is a great day for everyone,” he said, as he removed a wedgie. “Not only is The Berk gonna clean house, he’s gonna make sure that all Mexican laborers get free sandwiches on Fridays.”

The Berk’s passion for Friday feedings of the entire Arizona populace was one of his main running points. Republican incumbent Jan Brewer was shocked at The Berk’s sweep of the election.

“I’m appalled,” Brewer said at her loser’s press conference. “It’s as if the great people of the state of Arizona would prefer to have a retard running things than Mr. [Terry] Goddard or I.”

Democratic candidate Goddard was equally bemused.

“You can’t have a person run the state who can’t even count to 10,” he said. “It’s just not good governance.”

When The Berk learned of his adversaries’ statements, he was filled with anger.

“I can count to 10,” he said. “One, two, [three], four, five, [six], [seven], eight, nine, 10,” he said, to a mix of thunderous applause and confused stares. “Eat that [expletive] Goddard!”

For Linda Brown, a retired court clerk, there was nothing interesting about Goddard or Brewer, but The Berk’s platform spoke to her core values. “Those two don’t have a clue, but The Berk’s a real man,” Brown said, over tacos and tequila at Don Juan’s Taco Taxi in Phoenix. “I worked for the state for 41 years, and I gotta tell you, there’s nothing but crooks and thieves running the place. It’s time for a change. Go get ‘em Berk!”

The Berk also promised to criminalize farting in public, with suggested penalties ranging from forced readings of Sarah Palin’s book Going Rogue, to changing the 13,000 compact fluorescent light bulbs in Al Gore’s mansion. Although harsh, The Berk claims these consequences will deter people from emanating disagreeable odors, a fact which The Berk said “causes the ozone to get [expletive]-up.”

Perhaps the leading factor in The Berk’s win was his impeccable military record, according to political analyst Darryl McCombs of the Nuremberg Institute for Genocidal Rehabilitation and Organizational Education. “A NIGROE poll taken a week before the election indicated that The Berk was favored because of his 139 confirmed kills in Iraq,” McCombs said in his busy office in Waco, Texas. “People also said that they felt like they could trust him, because Paris Hilton trusted him for several months with her fingernails – which aren't even insured!”

As an independent, The Berk stole votes from both sides of the isle, eliciting a fury in the House and Senate. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) said that she almost choked on her organic tofu tuna veggie burrito when she heard the news of The Berk’s victory. “I’m just glad he’s not coming to Washington,” Pelosi said at her sweatshop in Indonesia. “Arizona could use a little shaking up. Isn’t cocaine legal there?”

The Berk raised an impressive $342 million for the campaign, receiving money from donors such as Mariah Carey, Ryan Seacrest, Hugh Hefner, Lady Gaga, that creepy midget guy whose in all those movies, and Rush Limbaugh. In a statement, Limbaugh said that The Berk is “the right man for Arizona.”

“Listen, all this talk about intelligence is moot,” Limbaugh said. “If intelligence was a prerequisite for public office, how in the hell did George W. make it? Wait a second, are we on record?”

Not to be outdone by stupid statements, Sean “P-Ditty Daddy Corn Puffs” Combs said that he couldn’t believe that a “cream-colored man who hates tacos can be elected in Arizona... But I like the dude. He smells like Purell. I like Purell.”

After Combs’ statement, Purell donated $50,000 to Combs’ charity, Get Out and Vote Even if You’re Uninformed. The Berk was also endorsed by Purell, as well as Walmart, Nike, McDonalds, Starbucks, Bank of America, Goldman Sachs, the Mortgage Bankers Association and the countries of North Korea, Iran and Israel. “Thank God for Citizens United!” The Berk said, in a rare moment of lucidity.

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said that he was thrilled to finally have something in common with Israel.

“Arizona, although part of the Zionist conspiracy, represents cool stuff,” Ahmadinejad said at a press conference for men. “If The Berk can take Arizona, maybe there is hope for United States and their scantily clad, cleavage-laden, voluptuous, curvy, nipples...” Ahmadinejad then quickly ran off the podium, holding his groin and muttering incoherently.

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu mostly agreed with Ahmadinejad. “I sometimes have spontaneous emissions as well,” he said. “But only since we’ve been resettling in the Gaza Strip. It feels sooo good to be bad!”

When asked about The Berk, Netanyahu said that he respects the man’s straightforwardness and honesty. “He tells it like it is,” Netanyahu said, over pork sandwiches and oysters overlooking the destruction of squalid Palestinian houses. “Arizona needs a straight shooter, someone who can kick out all the immigrants. That’s the kind of man I would want in my government.”

At the top of The Berk’s list is to establish a public-private partnership with K-Y Brand to develop a sexual lubricant using DNA from pop superstar Madonna. “I used to bang Madonna,” claimed The Berk. “I used to bang all sorts of chicks. I had a threesome with Pelosi and Palin. I don’t discriminate.”

The Berk said that his goal is to save women the “trouble of getting turned on.” Sales of the lubricant will fund sex education in public schools, and could help to reduce tax rates. “It was Palin’s idea,” The Berk humbly admitted. “She’s truly brilliant.”

Palin could not be reached for comment, but her assistant’s personal assistant’s spokesperson said that “Mrs. Palin has never slept with Mr. Berkowitz. She only sleeps with her relatives, and she clearly has no polak in her blood.”

The Berk begins his four-year term in January. He is divorced three times and has nine children by seven mothers, and three children through sperm donations to gay couples.

Free market orgasms at thought of liquor store privatization

After nearly 80 years of state-controlled liquor sales, Virginians are on the verge of tasting booze not tainted by the hands of Uncle Sam. And thank goodness. The idea of having low alcohol-related death rates means nothing when there are millions to be made by the sale of the commonwealth’s liquor stores. God bless capitalism.

In a Sept. 13, 2010 press release, Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli stated that “Virginians who are concerned that alcohol-related problems, such as under-aged drinking and drunk driving fatalities, will increase under privatization, they can be assured that the research has shown there is no greater incidence of alcohol-related problems in states with private ownership of liquor stores than in states with government ownership.”

Cuccinelli’s “research” reference is a report drafted by the Virginia Institute for Public Policy – a conservative think tank. In the report, objectively referred to as “Impaired Judgement: The Failure of Control States to Reduce Alcohol-Related Problems,” authors and economists Donald J. Boudreaux, PhD, and Julia Williams concluded that “the alleged health benefits of government-spirits monopolies are illusory,” and that “detailed regression analysis using data from all 50 states and D.C. finds no statistically significant relationship between the rates of drunk-driving fatalities in control states and such fatalities in license states.”

Gov. Bob McDonnell is certainly taking this information and running with it. At at time when state revenues are falling and unemployment is rising, the governor’s proposal to generate $500 million from the sale of the state’s liquor stores to fund transportation projects in the commonwealth seems a win-win. Jobs will be created as retail locations expand their staff to handle the new inventory, and liquor stores currently operated by g-men will turn over to Joe the (drunk) plumber.

Our fledgling Virginia Department of Transportation will get a much needed injection of capital so that we won’t have to weave around potholes on I-64 anymore. After all, $500 million represents a hefty 15 percent addition to VDOT’s FY 2011 budget of $3.3 billion. Annual liquor sales from ABC stores in 2009 only generated $111.7 million, and last time I counted to the millions, I remember arriving to 111 million waaaaay before I got to 500 million. So we’re making out like bandits, right?

But wait. I forgot. The $500 million is a one time deal. But surely the revision of Virginia’s Alcoholic Beverage Control regulations will ensure an adequate tax on spirits, as it currently taxes wine and beer which generate roughly $150 million in annual tax revenue for the state. Privatizing and taxing liquor sales would generate revenue, so the revenue question could be moot.

But what about the rock-solid data provided by the objective and agenga-free Virginia Institute for Public Policy? Who cares that the VIPP board of directors is strewn with die-hard conservatives with affiliation to all sorts of partisan organizations, like the Cato Institute, Radio America and Oliver North? It doesn’t matter, not when you’re talking about privatization. Privatization is always the way to go, look how well it’s worked in the health insurance industry. Every American has inexpensive health care and nobody experiences double-digit percentage increases in their annual health insurance costs. Give the lion the jungle and she will find her feast. Duh!

Boudreaux and Williams assert that there is no difference in alcohol-related health risks between the 18 states that currently control liquor sales verses the rest of the country that simply tax it. Their report is a testament to their strenuous and educated effort to illuminate this controversial issue with unbiased representation. It doesn’t matter that states which only tax liquor sales experience 79 more alcohol related deaths out of 10,000 auto fatalities than states which control sales. It’s only 79 more people dead. It’s not statistically significant.

Of course when you reduce the equation, the numbers do seem insignificant as Boudreaux and Williams are quick to point out:

What about drunk-driving fatalities? Here, too, there is no statistically significant relationship between control states and license states. The average annual number of drunk-driving fatalities for control states was 31.06 per 100 driving fatalities (or 31.06 percent of motor vehicle fatalities were alcohol related in control states) in 2008; the average annual number of drunk-driving fatalities for license states in 2008 was 31.85. The national average was 31.57 per 100 driving fatalities.

Now, I’m no mathematician, but I know a little about decimals. I also know that people are not decimal points. In 2008, drunk drivers accounted for 31.85 percent of auto fatalities in states that did not regulate liquor sales. But in the interest of human decency, let’s say that 3,185 deaths out of 10,000 auto fatalities were alcohol related in “free market” states. It doesn’t really matter that Boudreaux and Williams forgot to mention that these numbers are for alcohol-related fatalities, and not alcohol-impaired fatalities which are actually a greater percentage of driving fatalities. But that information wouldn’t support the privatization argument, so bury that data!

Now let’s look at the control states, and let’s see if we can use the same data Boudreaux and Williams used to put real numbers in a real context. In 2008, there were 84.5 million people living in the 18 states that control liquor sales. According to the National Highway and Traffic Safety Administration, there were 9,754 auto fatalities in 2008 in those eighteen states, and of those fatalities, 3,029 were alcohol-related. But if alcohol was not state controlled, those numbers could have increased to 3,107 people, meaning an additional 78 people could have died in those 18 states.

But 78 people is statistically insignificant according to Boudreaux and Williams, especially when there’s bucks to be made.

The VPPI report indicated that the United States averages 3,157 alcohol-related deaths per 10,000 auto fatalities. So states that regulate the sale of liquor are lower than both the national average and the average of states that license the sale of liquor to private industry. Strange how the same data can be looked at through two completely different lenses. I just prefer to assume that human beings are better suited as whole numbers rather than fractions, but that could just be my narrow communistic perspective.

The convoluted term “statistically insignificant” refers to the deviation in the actual statistic, which in this case was plus/minus 5 percent, meaning that actual data does not reflect extenuating circumstances and other mitigating factors than can skew the data. So the numbers could be much higher or much lower. But in reality, we know that limiting access limits consumption. Improving access improves consumption. It’s not a scientific survey, it’s common sense. With more hospitals, prices go down and more people are served, right? The more grocery stores we have, the more food that’s available to be purchased, prices go down, and fewer people will go hungry, right? Isn’t that a basic tenant of economics?

But for some reason, the conservative businesspeople on capitol slope think that improving access to alcohol will only benefit the commonwealth because of the much needed jobs that will be generated. Who care that dozens more people could die per year? At least the family and friends of the deceased won’t have to drive so far to purchase their mourning-specific beverage of choice to help them dull the pain of their loss.

Give them games, declares Ceasar. Give them spirits to dull their minds. Entertain them. Keep them fat and happy and you can get away with murder. Fill the Gulf of Mexico with oil and then forget it all with the World Cup.

If the Commonwealth of Virginia is going to privatize its state-run liquor stores, then it’s high time it legalizes medicinal marijuana.

When alcohol prohibition was appealed in 1933, the state established the Liquor Control Committee to “examine and propose a plan for liquor control in the Commonwealth,” and so began our commie takeover of the booze business. Nearly 80 years later we’ve gotten to the point where we want to give the reigns to Joe the (drunk) plumber. Why can’t we start the same process with marijuana, so that 80 years from now we can hand control over to Joe the (high) plumber? Government has no business regulating the sale of drugs anyway.

Oh, wait a minute. What about the Food and Drug Administration? Let’s just get rid of the FDA, too. Pharmaceutical companies always have our best interests at heart. They never sell a drug with a laundry list of side effects that includes death (and if you experience death please be sure to contact your doctor right away).

But let’s be realistic. At least marijuana has documented medical effects. The drug Sativex was recently introduced in Europe and Canada, and its active ingredient is natural THC – the active chemical in marijuana – extracted directly from the cannibis sativa plant and used to treat pain and spasticity associated with multiple sclerosis. There are more than a dozen medications that use cannabinoid compounds which interact with the same neural receptors as THC. Fourteen states including Washington, D.C. have passed medical marijuana laws, and the FDA does not have a single death claim attributed directly to medicinal use of marijuana, whereas tens of thousands of people have died from other “legal” drugs.

But we’d much rather legalize something synthetic because it’s easier to control and it’s better for business. Criminalizing a natural plant that was here before we walked the earth is an exercise in self-deification, an unforgivable act of hubris that sums up everything that’s wrong with society. Why don’t we make avocados illegal, because they have so much fat? Fat kills people way faster than marijuana, there’s no disputing that fact. Of course, marijuana might make a person more susceptible to consuming fat after a bout with the munchies, but that’s an issue of self-control, not a legal consideration.

Legalize marijuana, tax it and reap the benefits. Especially now that ABC stores are going private. What better time to take advantage of the loosening of the Man’s grip on free enterprise than to introduce a medicinal plant to the marketplace? I’m sure that Phizer and Roche and Bayer and all the big dogs will come out with their heady brand of ganja-liciousness: Weedex. Herbitol. Reefergra.

Philip Morris will have it’s brand, it’s smooth smoking Greenports that will start off as medicinal and 50 years from now there will be a lawsuit against them because they added chemicals to the ganja to ensure maximum addiction. Then they’ll be forced to fund a campaign that tells everyone how bad marijuana is and they’ll begin integrating with other markets and business ventures to clean up their act in the public eye.

Sell them ABC buildings. What are they doing in the government’s hands anyway? Being controlled and regulated? PFF! Whatever. Let the Joes and Joans of the world handle it. The world is already overpopulated, and the more people who die will be good for the mortician business. Long live free market eugenics!